


Anti-Funeral

by timdadanon



Series: Silver Skull [7]
Category: The Aquabats! Super Show!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Fashion, Gen, Presumed Dead, death mention, implied blink-182, mixed continuity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:00:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21851827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timdadanon/pseuds/timdadanon
Summary: the aquabats and friends throw an anti-funeral for prince adam
Series: Silver Skull [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1237850
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Anti-Funeral

The starry expanse of space is a medium for countless contrasting emotions. On the surfaces of planets across the universe, creatures turn their eyes to the sky to find familiar connections; constellations drawn out by ancient thinkers, moons and galaxies given meaning through art and stories, the motions of satellites and spacecrafts to remind the creatures below that living beings can manage to exist darn near anywhere, and the constancy of these feelings instills a sense of calm in the hearts and brains and other metaphorical organs of those who know the feeling of soil beneath their bodies.

Hyla sat in his tiny room on the space-station-turned-refugee-base. In the five or six years since he’d escaped Space Monster M’s prison, he’d learned that someone had managed to defeat the cosmic villain. The shock was what had given the band of prisoners the opening they’d needed to rebel, and so far, at least three of the four prisons had been overtaken by those once held captive.

The room was not much, but it was cluttered enough to be home. A smooth metal desk was covered in wax drippings and scattered metal tools accenting mostly clean glasses and an array of candles. He kept himself busy in the makeshift space colony, becoming a resident glass-blower and candlemaker; practical hobbies that helped him feel useful.

Space was not a comfort to Hyla. He could recall being young, staring up at the moons of his homeworld and looking to the beauty of the stars. Captivity had changed that. He had been awestruck at seeing space for the first time following his jailbreak, but nothing was as he remembered it. The constellations were all wrong, there were no twin moons, one with craters that looked like a water lily that storytellers sang was planted by the gardener living in a lunar bog. There was no familiarity in the stars, just a vast starry desert between him and everything he knew.

The horrors of what they’d endured at the hands of their captors continued to weigh on them, and probably always would. None of the escapees had the heart to return to their homes, though reasons why varied. Sometimes the idea of being able to return home and deal with how different life would be was too much. Sometimes the distance was too great, the technology required to return unobtainable. Sometimes there wasn’t enough to return to.

There was a knock on the door, followed by an immediate opening when Hyla didn’t give a negative response. A grinning pink sea slug-like creature burst into the room.

“Parva?” Hyla stood up. “I thought this was your sleep cycle. Everything okay?”

“Hyla! We got an incoming transmission from system YD-44-C!”

Hyla blinked in surprise. Parva didn’t wait for a response.

“It’s Adam!” they bubbled. “Prince Adam is okay! He’s been found alive on his home planet!”

Hyla felt like he was flying. Adam was okay! The last time he’d seen the Prince had left him crushed for weeks. Watching your closest friend be dragged away, knowing what would happen to him… he was one of the first of dozens ‘reprogrammed’ by M, and there had only been a handful of instances of escape, much less recovery. How had he managed to break away?!

“We just got the message in,” they continued. “ _ Prince Adam DeAdam of Aquabania, former prisoner of Space Monster M, is alive and well. If you know him and are in the area near our system, this is an invitation to his Anti-Funeral on October 18th, RSVP for more details. BYOBF, bring your own bad fashion sense. _ ”

“We have to be there!” Hyla exclaimed, elated. “What is the current earth date?”

Parva taped on their tablet they were using to review the transmission.

“Um, October 3rd.”

“And if we leave now, on earth date will we arrive?” Hyla somehow managed to grin wider.

Parva did some more tapping, only to awkwardly frown.

“Um, December 14th,” they read, deflated. “That’s about 70 earth days. The party is in 15.”

“Oh.”

Hyla looked deterred, but not yet disappointed.

“Well, we should probably go anyway even if we are crazy late.”

“True, I’ll round up the rest of the old Cell Block #181 gang. We’ll just have to bring one heck of an afterparty.”

The planning for Adam’s anti-funeral had been a whirlwind of activity. At first, the ‘bats had only expected it to be them and maybe one of their old openers, but once the news got out, it seemed like everyone they knew was expressing interest in seeing how Adam was doing and opening the time capsule that was his “empty” casket. Needless to say, it was a brimming beachside shindig, with everyone in attendance intentionally subverting the solemn and formal dress code of a wake by dressing in the most loud and tacky apparel they could muster, something made notable by the fact that most of them already dressed in loud and/or tacky fashions as casual wear.

Adam himself was quite nervous.It had only been a month since his rescue, and while most of his lighter bruising had healed, he still looked and felt a little worse for wear. For him, the worst damage wasn’t the bouts of confusion, exhaustion, the occasional migraine episode, or even the bad haircut left by the effects of the Silver Skull helmet. The greatest physical damage was the M insignia left branded onto his forehead by the mind control device; it was what made looking in the mirror the hardest. Thankfully for him, Catboy had thrown together a bunch of bandanas to cover the scar. The one he had picked for the occasion had been made from a patterned fabric Commander picked up on his regular run to a local Japanese import store, and had adorable rabbit mascot characters all over them. He paired this with a neon pink rashguard, the rave pants his team mates had mercifully kept from when he and Jimmy went clubbing when the both of them came of age, and some basic flip flops. 

Adam followed a path he had taken thousands of times before, down from the cliff side hill behind the lab, down to the beach, where the party was in full swing. Before he could even set foot on the sand, a figure decorated with a dozen clashing fabric patterns shoved a plastic trinket into his hands. He turned the cheap, shiny object over in his hands to examine was what was clearly a child’s birthday crown adorned with pink felt and feather with a sticky note reading “NOT DEAD!” over its “Birthday Girl” text. He looked up to see the Bat Commander grinning at him. 

“It’s for you bud, I think you should wear it!”

Adam chuckled a bit a the tacky crown and then put it on. The MCBC put a hand on Adam’s shoulder.

“I do need to warn ya of something that might wig ya out, Mann is here.”

Mann.

His doppelganger. 

When he’d first met the musical duo of Digital Unicorn, it was agreed that the resemblance between Adam and Mann was uncanny. As people, the two certainly had their differences, such as Mann’s unique speech pattern, but in appearance they could easily be mistaken for twins. While Adam looked forward to catching up, it would definitely be a shock to see him now. 

“How is he?”

“Well, for one thing he’s dyed his hair blue, so it looks like we’ll be able to tell you two apart now.”

Commander then pointed over to Mann, who was talking to Trusty Dusty. From what Adam could make out, they were talking about vacation spots in Canada. 

This awkward eavesdropping was interrupted by Commander getting hit in the head with a toy hockey stick.

“What the-”

“It’s me, ya goober!”

Adam recognized the voice of the neon purple and orange hockey player that hit the Commander.

“Scott!”

It was Seaghost, of course.

“Adam, buddy, the man of the hour!” he greeted. “Mind if I borrow my cousin for a bit? We need help lifting your casket.”

“Um, sure. I’m gonna go mingle.”

And with that, Adam watched the two run off back up the hill. He felt a little lost in the mess of guest, looking over the crowd for recognizable faces. He locked eyes with Eaglebones, dressed in a Halloween-grade hippie costume, feeding cheese puffs to his invisible magic summon. He gave Adam a little wave; the guitarist had taken a little while to warm up to the prince, but things had been going pretty smoothly lately.

Only a second after, he felt a tap on his shoulder. It was Ricky, who was in a ugly Christmas sweater, mismatched tie-dye crocs, and metallic everything else.

“Hey, man!”

“No, it’s Adam,” he replied, as if by reflex. This sort of thing tended to happen when Adam and Mann were in the same place.

Ricky paused before what Adam was telling him hit him.

“Oh, no yeah I know it’s you!” he laughed. “I just have some new homies who've wanted to meet ya.”

He took Adam by the hand and led him over to a small, colorful crowd of new faces.

“Tina, Zalga, The Fox, Jimmy’s parents, and Shark Fighter; this is Prince Adam,” Ricky introduced, gesturing appropriately to each person in turn.

Adam opened his mouth to introduce himself to all these new faces, only for the man in a fox costume to dash out of sight. Ricky gave a little chuckle..

“Don’t worry, he’s shy. I’m surprised he showed up to be honest. Plus you still have 5 other people to meet.”

Adam’s hand was seized in a firm handshake by a beefy blond who seemed twice his size. He might have been intimidating, were it not for his earnest smile and Spongebob-patterned shirt and shorts.

“So!” the Shark Fighter grinned. “You’re the little prince, eh? Your friends told me you’ve got some pretty impressive powers.”

Adam grinned, inhaling deeply. He always loved an opportunity to show off.

“Well, I can tell for breakfast you had some reheated bacon and some instant apple cinnamon oatmeal.”

The Shark Fighter chuckled.

“Spot on! How’d ya pull off that deduction kid?”

“I have a spectacularly sensitive sense of smell. Cooking something in a microwave leaves a distinctive odor… And that brand of oatmeal is one of my favorites!”

The brunette girl in a duck Kigurumi piped in.

“Oh, don’t sell yourself short hun,” she spoke with a strong southern twang. “If I could do that I’d show it off too. I’m Tina, by the way.”

Tina then linked arms with the blond chick in the frog Kigurumi.

“And I’m Zalga.” Zalga grinned, glancing at Tina. “She’s my gal-pal. The Bats introduced us after we both got into some sticky situations they helped us out of. We’ve been close ever since!”

Adam raised an eyebrow, opening his mouth to comment on the woman’s bizarre name.

“Haven’t heard a name like that before.”

“Isn’t your name Adam Adam?”

“I mean, it’s Adam de Adam,” he smiled, “but you’re right.”

Finally, Adam was greeted by a stern looking man who did not seem used to smiling as much as he was, decked out in a sharp button-down decorated with early CGI patterns, and a kind looking woman in tourist gear. They introduced themselves as Mr. and Mrs. Goodman, and received him warmly.

“I’m surprised we’d not met you sooner, to be honest. Our Jimmy’s told us a bit about you.”

“Well, um,” Adam began sheepishly, “When your son joined the band, our professor and our Catboy found him half broken on the street and fixed him up, and he refused to say where he came from. And for Jimmy's sake of not being seen as a rogue robot, they claimed they’d built him together, and after a while we almost forgot that they didn't.”

“I’m not surprised, he was very unhappy at the farm, and  _ somebody _ had no idea how to deal with that and opted to drive our son away.” Mrs. Goodman elbowed her husband.

Jimmy’s father grumbled something inaudibly. 

“Look, I--” he consciously stopped himself, choosing his words more deliberately before continuing. "I’m not proud of what I did, but it’s in the past. Jimmy’s happy now. That’s what’s important.”

Jimmy’s mother smiled softly.

Tina then piped up again.

“Okay, how about happier conversations now?”

Adam’s attention shifted to a sight that was once familiar to him; a guy with a horse for a head, and a familiar someone who now had blue hair, with the pair wearing matching unicorn jackets.

“Well, I hate to chat and run, but… there’s someone I need to talk to.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Mrs. Goodman said. “You’re the man of the hour, after all. It was good to meet’cha.”

The prince took a deep breath as he approached Mann and Horse. It was always strange to talk to the man who shared his face, but Adam had been through a lot of change. This was bound to be a new level of strange.

He did look almost identical to when he’d last seen him, but in very subtle ways he did look older. More obviously, his hair was a fully blue, in a color that matched the jacket he typically wore. 

“You don’t have to glock. Come, I wanna talk.”

Adam came closer. He had learned not to question Mann’s speech quirks.

“Sorry Mann. I guess I feel weird now we look so different. It’s kinda weird seeing what I would of looked like if-”

“No,” Mann raised a single finger. “No apologies. Horse told me everything. The spacement tried to puppet you to destroy all you held dear. But now you are a real boy again, and you have no idea what to do with yourself. I want to let you know that even if we look different, you are still my double-goer, and I will be here for you.”

Horse nodded in agreement, which made Adam feel very loved. 

“Okay,” Mann raised his empty plastic cup. “Now I need punch. Until later, my double-goer.”

Adam watched the two walk off, and the joy of talking to Mann was quickly yoinked from his brain as he felt thick arms grab him from behind. Instinctively, he teleported out of the hold and drop kicked his assailant, who started laughing.

“Ah, Tiger Mask, he’s still got it!”

Once he snapped out of attack mode, he started laughing as well. It was El Macho Aguilla and Tiger Mask: The Wrestling Roadies, both masked and dressed like used car salesmen.

“Did you two miss me?”

They both grinned.

“You know it kid!”

“Man, M messed you up bad homie, you look like crap.”

Adam rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, well I’m good now, and I guess I’m on the list of former baddies with you two.”

“You and that Skylar kid,” Tiger Mask nodded. “Prof. told us y’all are giving him superpowers soon.”

Adam nodded.“He’s an Aquabat now, and so we gotta get that Aquabanian power activation in him.”

“Good for him.”

“Adam!”

Adam looked over to where his name was being called and looked over to see Jimmy, dressed in an outfit that had once been described as his ‘ _ dude, what if I was a Vocaloid’ _ getup. He was yelling and gesturing for Adam to come over.

He told the roadies goodbye as he ran over to Jimmy.

“Adam, we’re ready to start the main event.”

After lots of digging, mingling, and set up. the main celebration was commencing. It almost looked like a wedding and/or baby shower for clowns; something not helped by the impromptu creation of a gifts table after nearly everybody ended up bringing something for Adam. Ironically, Most of the gift table was taken up by a very big gift basket sent by the absent Tito, unable to find the time for a day off now that he was crazy rich and busy. Needless to say, Adam wasn't running out of vegan gummy bears anytime soon. 

The MC Bat Commander was brimming with his signature concert energy as he got the crowd pumped up. He had been living up to his title as a master of ceremonies, improvising a speech until Adam was ready to take the stage. 

“And now, friends of the Aquabats!” he announced. “I officially welcome you to the Anti-Funeral of our dear friend, our treasured member of the Aquabats family, Prince Adam de Adam the XXVIIIth--um, the twenty-eighth-- of Aquabania!”

The applause commenced at his deliberate pause, settling down at the casual, conversational raising of a hand. The man knew how to control a crowd.

“Adam has been missing for nearly a decade and a half, and is finally back to us. Hooray!” he gave a happy little jazz hands gesture. “The only problem is that after seven years of being missing, it is considered standard procedure to presume the missing person dead. As such, we threw him a funeral, and by Aquabanian tradition, we buried his belongings in place of the not dead, but just missing, Adam. However now that he is back, he’s gonna need his stuff back. So guys, bring in the casket!”

Crash, Chainsaw, Catboy, and Ricky brought in the casket. Commander then nodded to Adam.

“Okay buddy, it's time to open your casket. Your un-deathday present, from all of us to you.”

Adam lifted off the lid, opening up a time capsule that made him uneasy.

It was one of his full outfits; helmet, mask, rashguard, belt, shorts, socks, and vans, laid out perfectly in the middle of the casket as though his body had been laid to rest and completely vaporized. The clothes were surrounded by various items he recognized as his own-- his minidisc player, his book of poetry his keytar, and more.

He just stared a the contents for a second and his mind filled with the intention of the set up. This, to the Aquabats, had been him. Each item had been placed here with the tearful acceptance that he wouldn’t be back, and they wanted him to keep what was his. After a moment of reflection, he nudged the MCBC, who handed him the microphone. He knew exactly what to say.

“A word to the unaware,” he began. “Traditionally, Aqubanians believed you soul could not pass on without somewhere to rest. Whether it was a tomb, shrine, urn, or other vessel, a person needed somewhere to relax so the psychopomps could find you. After they did, they would guide you with all the other deceased to pass on into what comes next on the first day of the new year. Had I been killed in space, my anchored soul would have traveled faster than starlight back to Earth, and there I would have been left to wander, until I eventually found my way back to the lab, to the back garden, and finally into my tomb to have one last rest before moving on. Had my friends-- my family-- not done this, my soul would have been lost to the void of space without anything to grasp on to. The fact that they did this all for me reminds me I am loved, something I am reminded of further with all of you gathered today, as now I’m allowed to be alive again. And I intend to use my life for good, as I had before, and as I will until we all gather again once I am done with this life, and once again left to the soft care of the reaper.”

The crowd was enraptured by his words, but didn’t know how to respond once he had finished. They were silent until a single voice cut through the crowd.

“Very well put, Adam!”

A single skinny man in a black, Fury-era Aquabats uniform stood behind the crowd, drawing the eyes of the anti-mourners.

“KYU!?” The Commander exclaimed in confusion.

The elusive Aquabat smiled, half coy and half teasing. 

“Sorry that I’m… fashionably late…”

Kyu then began to snicker while Crash, dressed in his finest Bowser cosplay, rolled his eyes.

“I’d say you’re underdressed if anything.”

“Yeah, um, I think I missed the memo..”

The pressure of dozens of eyes weighed down on Kyu.

“Um, let’s finish this party,” he said sheepishly. “Anything else I wanted to say can wait.”

“Good!” The Commander affirmed with a grin. “Because now that Adam has his stuff back, it’s time for cookie cake!”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you to @feelysonheelys for doing an outstanding job editing yet again


End file.
